I wanted to let you all know a few things about me. Yes I am a recovering addict however I do not believe marijuana is addicting. I believe anything is addicting if you do it enough for it to cause problems. I was smoking daily, I’m not sure that I ever let myself come down from the high. So I have chosen not to quit but to stop buying it. That doesn’t mean that I will not enjoy it at times or that I will not use it sometimes to help slow my head. It simply means I did abuse it and I am living my consequences of abusing it now by not being able to afford anything. I really want and need a place I can call home and me I simply had to prioritize what do you want more? Do you want to be stuck living with others for the rest of your life so you can get high on a daily basis or do you want to pull your head out of your ass and grow up a little and use it as medication rather then for coping with the consequences of my choices.
Is it going to be easy to break the daily habit no because that’s what it has become is a habit and I know those are not easy to break. But my will is strong and I do believe that I can control my intake and I will. I just thought you all should know that about me.
Oh one more thing, I unlike most recovering addicts do not believe that there is no cure. I at one time popped pills like they were going out of style and drank more then the largest man in the bar. Yet today I can have pills all over the house and booze and choose to not do it. I am around booze on a daily basis and pills are easy enough for me to get I just don’t have the urge at all anymore. Yes there are time’s when I hear the bottle calling however I know that when hear it calling that’s the one time to run the fuck away and just say no.
Who knows maybe I’m wrong and I will fall again but I don’t believe not for one second that I will fall. I guess well all get to watch live and see how my journey pans out huh?